Ancestral Patterns: Repeat or Heal

Ancestral Patterns: Repeat or Heal?

The two young men stood either side of a thin white line drawn on the ground. A truce. For now. But for how long, unknown.

One of the men wore a uniform made up of strongly starched khaki pants and a button-down shirt. On his sleeves were embroidered stripes of purple and navy. On his left breast were lines of medals that tinkled as his right arm raised high above his head and sliced the air as it came down. His movements were stiff and controlled, orderly and ordered. The other man had no such uniform. Instead, his pants were made of thick beaten wool, and he wore on his torso a thin white cotton shirt, dirty and un-ironed. He was not orderly on the outside, but his mission was just as driven, just as orchestrated as the other side, and just if not more, just. The men now stood heart to heart with the thin white line in between; their faces stony as the ground upon which their feet were planted.

Ask either of them and they would tell you, vehemently, that they were right. One defending, the other attacking. Each believed they fought for what was good and true and beautiful—an ideal that in all likelihood, simply did not exist in the real world. Both men had hearts that were fearless and thus that at times that made them fearful—and to be feared by those that loved them and those who did not. Each man left a legacy in their DNA that spun down through the generations under them. Each legacy had an energetic pattern that tied them together forever. Each story a thread on the ancestral tapestry that wraps around their descendants like a tattooed shawl—making it mighty impossible to simply throw off one’s shoulders. Both men believed they were leaving a better world for me.

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Within our DNA is woven generations of ancestral patterning. This seems like such an obvious statement to make—of course we are made up of ancestral patterning! Our physical features are handed down in our DNA and when we are young, we are often compared to individuals in the generations above us. Who has heard something like, “you have the wild hair of your father” or “you are just as intense as your Aunty Nuala!” ok, that second one is mine but still, you get the point. We have all heard something about our traits and the people we inherited them from over the years. Individuals who do not hear words of comparison or see the resemblances to their ancestors due to adoption or abandonment, seek to know who they come from like a mirror with no reflection. We are from them, the ones who came before us, and that is that.

But there are other patterns that we inherit also. We have aversions to certain foods we may or may not understand. We have gifts we may not realize have been handed down by our grandfathers or great-grandmothers, like the ability to write or the ability to communicate with the unseen world. For you it may be the ability to paint or the desire to seek justice for those who do not have a voice such as our feather friends or our tree relatives. I’m not saying all our drives or desires have been handed down but some at least of them we embody or resist.

Sadly, we also carry within us the wars they have fought—or suffered, trying to live through. You, like me, may have had great-or-grandparents whose two sides were at war with each other. One side the colonizer, the other the colonized. One side the perpetrator, the other the victim. And so, within your being there is a war. The war within—a biological war, a philosophical war, a geographical war that has spun down into your body, your psyche, your being—made manifest from the moment you were born.

We have to choose. Every single day, we must choose—do I repeat the war, seek retribution for the wrongs committed against my loved ones? Do I seek revenge, fully believing I have the right to do so—not understanding, not believing perhaps that I am simply perpetuating an old war.

We have to choose. Do we catch ourselves, the sometimes-biological urges to seek revenge upon those who hurt our forbearer’s and thus break the cycle. Can we seek peace?

The new wars are not new. Rarely is a war begun that did not have generational conditioning or residual powder, like a shotgun cartridge left at a scene. Each person has the opportunity to scratch an old familial scar a little too hard, causing it to bleed.  Each generation, as a generation, has the opportunity to break our ancestral patterns and begin healing the wound within and with-out.

First, we could at least try to come to terms with the warring factions within our own beings. We could learn our familial history, the smaller and larger stories that are woven within the tapestry of our own sweet imperfect bodies. Who else resides within us? What are the stories and patterns that keep playing out in our lives? Who do they belong to? Are they even ours? What are the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves and about what we have the right to do or be angry about? Where are we at war within our own bodies, our own psyches, or our own hearts?

There are many different colored threads that go to make up the fabric of an individual. Some of those threads have been colored red by the blood of others. Old tapestries need mending. Old tapestries need a damn good wash. Old tapestries need tending to with love and care to tell the stories of old, but we need to be mindful of not treading the same worn paths.

Holy Whole: A Time For Ending All Splits

Sitting on the wooden floor in front of the hearth the aging woman gathered her skirts around her to form a great big nest. Her skirt, the color of the late summer midnight sky was soft and cozy; the fire was warm and snug. The light from the fire creates a glow like that of a post set-sun when the sky hangs onto a deep umber and bounces off the amber medicine jars that line the walls of the forest cottage.

She closed her eyes, took a slow but long exhale, and readied her bottom by nustling back and forth in her seat. Then, when she was calm and centered, she called them forward, the unwanted or unloved children of varying ages within herself. Out of her heart, they climbed, one by one, and onto her lap. She beckoned the wiley one, the young teen one, the one who went hungry. After a deep inhale and another long exhale, she encouraged the magical child—the one who knew how to speak with the animals and flowers, the cats, and bees, and the brave one who went through things, like the grown men of war, when she was still oh so young. Gathered in the dark blue skirts she sang them into healing, and she sang them into wholeness. Each in turn, she looked them in the eye and witnessed their deepest suffering, their greatest gifts, and most abundant joy. And when the fire had turned to ash and the sun was close to peaking over the horizon, the inner parts of herself stood and merged into the old woman as one. She had healed herself, Holy Whole.

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Now, is the time to heal all splits that have been created through that of a fractured system. Splits that are rooted in a paradigm that no longer serves humanity. The divisions we have created and live by consciously and unconsciously must be healed if humanity is to take a much-needed evolutionary conscious raising shift. We are at war with the planet, the natural world, each other, and ourselves. Good and bad, black and white, right and wrong, science and spirit, human over animal, man over woman, head over heart, thinking over feeling, and proof over other forms of knowing. The world is not divided neatly down the middle as much as the binary system believes. There is more than just democrats and republicans, white and black, gay or straight, man or woman. Healing towards a space and place of wholeness must encompass all.

Wholeness does not mean perfect. Rather, wholeness means that all the parts within the whole are owned and not disowned, like all the parts of the old woman in our story above. Wholeness acknowledges and embraces the many faces of a system rather than just two. Now, is the time for ending all splits within the system, for looking at what is not working. Revision of our current paradigm requires us each to look at the aspects of our culture (all cultures, not just the white Western culture) that do not serve the growth of all humanity rather than the few and make changes in the system that addresses the imbalances. Equality is not the issue, equity is.

Can science and mysticism come together to create something greater? Can we live symbiotically with the natural world and recognize the innate intelligence of all aspects of plants, animals, minerals, rivers, and mountains? What if there were more than two main political parties within the USA? Would respect, curiosity, and compassion lead us to a different question and thus future? Maybe, but human nature is what it is and a shift in perspective can never be forced. We can’t force the dissolving of established divisions we can all only hold what we can at any given moment, but the invitation is to look at what challenges you experience within the current culture and why, and with a sense of curiosity.

Family systems are small worlds, mini versions of the world at large. Every member of a family is different, and every family system is different. Some people have very simple family trees, or you may be like me, and have a family forest with complex intertwining lines, steps, and halves, those who are estranged or favored, or those who live nearby or halfway across the world. Just like the world outside of the home, most families have some divisions of view, ways of being in the world, and a spectrum of beliefs as to the root causes of issues (in and out of the home), vastly different perspectives on life, love, gender, sexual orientation, ecology, and the economy. We have all heard the saying “Don’t talk politics or money at the holiday table,” which means there are subjects that are going to be hard for most people to be open to openly discussing. And if we can’t talk about the hard stuff with our families in a way that comes from curiosity rather than a staunch position on an issue, then how are we supposed to heal the divisions in the bigger world?

Lastly, and on a more personal note what we see in the outer world is a mirror of the little and big divisions within ourselves. Anytime we experience a traumatic situation during our developmental years—part of us separates (partially or completely) for protection and survival. All the splintered parts of us are still inside our adult selves waiting to be called into consciousness and healed. We all have younger selves inside of the adult body we move through the world with and those younger, often wounded parts of ourselves, need to be seen, acknowledged, and integrated. We may remember things we have done we are ashamed of, or that fill us with rage, or deep suffering and they need our adult self’s compassion and witnessing. And it is not just the parts of us that we are ashamed of, or angered by, but also the bright, smart, tenacious aspects of ourselves that we pushed aside to belong to a group or just the mainstream world. We have unique ways of being in the world that, when we are younger often shunned by our young peer group, our family systems, and eventually ourselves. Avoiding vulnerability and shame does not make it go away, avoiding past pain does not make it magically disappear. Like the old woman with the dark blue skirts in our story above, we need to bring all these aspects of ourselves forth through the compassion of our heart center so we can heal holy whole. By doing our best (over a lifetime mind you) to heal the splits and divisions within ourselves we can shift the world in us and thus around us. Be gentle with yourself and each other, birthing a new life is rarely pain-free.

Selene: Power of the Luna Cycles

Oh Selene, how powerful you are to pull forth the worlds’ oceans up close to you when you arrive in your full magnificent form. How you encourage the oceans, waterways, rivers, and streams to raise their shimmering faces so as to receive a near brush of your cheek across their surface. Oh, to be so close yet so far as to never be able to touch you in return! The most teasing of temptations, like a lover who has distanced themselves, whom you can see but can never run the soft print of your index finger across their lips. Selene, or do you prefer Luna, or Coyolxauhqul? We do not mind for we know you go by many names from your global array of human subjects. But do whisper what you prefer, and I will oblige, for I call you Selene when I take the dogs out late at night. Your voice asks me to surrender my downward gaze and tilt my head in reverence to your beauty.

Luna, when your full body crests across the eastern horizon and you allow yourself to fill the blue of the night sky, and light the path for the wild ones in the forest do you mean to call forth the water and blood in my own body? You do know, don’t you that you encourage poets and dreamers, lovers, and romantics to feel deeply into the collective realm of emotions so that they may release on their pillows or writing pad what many dare not say. You do know also that you call forth the wild ones who swim or glide within your oceans and those who seek to hook them? Luna, you do know how you tempt me to bathe myself anew underneath your silver light especially when you reveal yourself twice in one month? Do you know? Of course, you do. Oh, of course you do!

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In mythologies of most every culture, the moon has been personified as a female deity, Selene to the Greeks, Luna to the Romans, and Coyolxauhqul to the Aztecs. In Greek mythology, Selene is the sister of Helios the sun and was thought to have birthed fifty daughters and the beautiful Narcissus by her human lover. In the Aztec tradition, the Coyolxauhqul was the moon goddess and after speaking her truth, a truth which revealed her father’s betrayal and yet sought to protect her mother, she was decapitated. Her grieving mother placed her daughter’s beautiful bright head in the night sky for all to see and remember that which fills them with loss and longing.

 As our closest neighboring astronomical body the moon has such a powerful impact on all water on earth. According to NASA the “moon and the earth exert a gravitational pull on each other. On Earth, the Moon’s gravitational pull causes the oceans to bulge out on both the side closest to the moon and the side farthest from the moon.” When we think of oceans that bulge, we think of swelling, high waves, and high tides and that is as a direct result of our proximity to this beautiful luminous body. Anyone in Florida, Georgia, or South Carolina would not have missed that the category 4 hurricane Idalia landed the eve of the super-full-blue-moon and left plenty of water in her wake. Given that 71% of the earth’s surface is water, the moon impacts the planet every single day. When the moon is full the water swells, when the moon is resting (new moon, or her dark phase) the water recedes also. It is an incredible dance between earth and moon, water, and gravity.  

Just like the planet we live on the average adult human body contains on average 60% water (between 45-75%). Some folks believe that during the varying phases of the lunar cycle human beings are impacted physically and for example our sleep patterns change, either better for some lucky ones or worse for others, our body temperature fluctuates, and kidney function increases. Mental and emotional health also can be impacted by the lunar cycles. The connection between the full moon and madness is known well beyond horror films with some police forces in the UK increase patrols on nights when Selene is in her full form. Did folks go mad with desire for their Beloved, or did she stir up emotions deliberately for their release? Have you noticed a change in your physical or emotional wellbeing with Selene’s waxing and waning?

There is a long-standing belief from goddess cultures or cultures who at least worshiped the moon as a feminine power figure of the connection between the moon and menstrual cycles. One of the other names for the moon is Mene from which we get the words mensis “month and thus menstruation. The connection between women, the moon, and menstruation, between the moon and mood, between the moon and women’s mysteries has been studied, pathologized, shamed, and demonized for centuries. Older, indigenous traditions honored the cycles of both the moon and women for the wisdom that arose under the blessing of the Goddess herself.

This week the earth was graced with a rare blue full supermoon (in fluid and emotional Pisces no less!), the like of which we will not see again until 2037. The moon was not literally blue in color but simply means a month (such as August) that has two full moons. Scientists, farmers, fishermxn, astrologers, astronomers, meteorologists, mystics, and mythologists continue to be fascinated with the moon cycles and their impact on human and planetary life. What is your relationship to the moon? Do you call the planet by a name? Are you aware of how the moon’s cycles impact you?

References:

Science: NASA. https://moon.nasa.gov/resources/444/tides/#:~:text=The%20Moon%20and%20Earth%20exert,are%20where%20low%20tides%20occur.

Media Full Moon and Behavior: https://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/full-moon-phenomenon-police-nhs-3800619

Mythology: Various.

Women’s Menstrual Wisdom and Goddess Journeys: please join my dear friend and colleague Dr. Annalisa Derr: https://www.journeytothegoddess.voyage

The Holy Fool and the Trickster

He tiptoed down the dark brown wooden stairway. The house was still coved in the blanket of the night sky. Upstairs there was light snoring coming from the main bedroom. In the downstairs room the snoring was even louder. “Hehehe. good” he thought, “they are all sleeping.” He set about taking three glasses from the kitchen cupboard and placed them upside down on the counter. Next was the little bowl place right in the middle of the dining room floor. Paper was strategically placed over toilet seats, aluminum foil covered phones, and an array of other little trickster maneuvers were made under the cover of darkness.

As morning light broke across the Pacific Ocean, snoring in the house ceased. Within moments of those sleepy heads stepping out of the various bedrooms the house was filled with language often only made by weather weary sailors. “What the !!!”, “Ahhhhhhhh”, “BUGGER” yelled the various voices. Those upside-down glasses were full of water, which now lay spilled on the floor, the bowl on the floor had beneath it an ancient creature which darted out across the bare footed one and that paper caused a bit of a splash…. Grrrr… there was only one little trickster in the house who could have caused this Saturday morning mayhem… and in unplanned unison the whole house cried out, “MILO!!!!”

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April 1st, Day of the Fool and Day of the Trickster!

The origins of April Fool’s Day cannot be verified, and no, that’s not a trick. There are several speculated reasons for how the day became legendary. Some folks claim that when the calendar shifted the new year from the spring equinox to January 1st that those further out from the papal center didn’t hear about the change immediately. As there was no social media in those days, the word of a new, New Year’s date took a bit time to spread out across the land. Folks still celebrating on the old calendar were considered gullible. Other theories include a hangover version of the Greco-Roman holiday, Hilaria which acknowledged the spring equinox and celebrated Goddess Cybele. Partakers of the celebration were considered ‘merry’ and ‘cheerful.’ Where and whenever the day originated, it belongs to both the trickster and the gullible. There will always be a new generation of tricksters, like our young friend Milo, ready to take up the charge and pull pranks on the unsuspecting.

Today, media giants such as Google are all in for creating elaborate offers to users such as the famous “projecting their inner thoughts” onto the screen, then gleefully announcing “error” numbers. In 2013, they announced they would no longer be allowing new video uploads onto YouTube and deleting the rest which caused quite stir. Major newspapers and corporations are now all in on the naughtiness of the day, so be aware of headlines and offers today save you find yourself falling prey to the machine.

Both the Fool and the Trickster are key archetypal patterns in the human social system. Fool has now become synonymous with stupid, but they are not the same thing at all! The Fool is actually wise, they are the ones who see through to the truth of a situation and don’t mind making themselves the butt of a joke in order for a truth to land gently. They understand that life can be difficult and are willing to take authority to task just for the sake of it. Today we take fool to be those who are gullible, naïve, and easily tricked. The fool is innocent and not yet cynical to life’s trials which creates two very different meanings of the word Fool.

The Trickster on the other hand uses a slight of hand. In mythology, the trickster was the one who stole fire from the Gods and gave it to humans for their earthly survival. The act caught the Divine by surprise, and they were not best pleased. In this story it is the gods who were fooled and that is something that didn’t happen often.

Humor is essential for human health. We can laugh at things or people but often the greatest humor is when we can laugh at our own humanness and our limitations. When we have been “fooled” by a prank, we can either get angry at being tricked or laugh at our vulnerability. The caveat here is that the trick should not be mean or cruel but used as a way to gently tease and highlight who we give over our trust and thus personal authority. Or if you are a young trickster, how deft you are at catching those older than you in your web. Essentially asking, “does age always mean maturity?” The answer is a resounding no.

Who tricks the trickster….? Walking out the restaurant last night, on what was a balmy Sydney evening, I leaned over to my young friend, Milo and said, “did you know that the word gullible is not in the dictionary.”

His brown eyes widened, and the word “really” popped out of his mouth in astonishment. I tilted my head, looking at him like a crow having just spotted a shiny object and winked… “Gotcha.” I smiled. He laughed and I suspect will use that on his friends in the years to come.

Be aware of being played today. Be nice if you are playing. Don’t believe everything you see, hear, or read today. Laugh if you get caught. Happy April Fool’s Day!